“Help”
“He lectured on and on about how the executive had failed to meet her numbers,” he told me. I was talking with one of the brightest leaders I know about a recent event on their leadership team. Their boss had chosen to hammer another team member because she didn’t reach her goal. This leader told me that he didn’t consider his boss's “help” to be very helpful.
It baffles me that so many seasoned leaders believe that constant lecturing is a constructive way to “help” their team members succeed. It seems that they would have learned by now that always bringing the hammer down on failures is almost never effective in changing behavior. When we choose to lecture, blame or demean others, it never helps. It actually undermines future success in the relationship and the team.
You hear a lot about values and principles, until the going gets tough. Then you see behavior that does not line up with the words that were spoken. The brilliant leader above had it right when he told me that as leaders, we need to “authenticate our words with our action”.
Let’s choose to offer guidance and feedback with respect laced with humility, instead of with arrogance. When we decide to offer help that actually helps, we will make a difference.
Larry
Check out our latest episode on the Crossing the Line Podcast:
John Bentley - Doing The Hard Things
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